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My Tinder matches were written messages by ChatGPT. It gave off a creepy vibe, according to a dating coach.



  • My Hinge matches were written by ChatGPT in January.
  • A dating expert reviewed the results from the AI-powered tool this month for Tinder.
  • People typically avoid its responses because they are wordy and creepy.
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In recent months, ChatGPT has accomplished a host of tasks, including writing cover letters, advising investors, and announcing layoffs. My Hinge match responses were even written by the AI-powered tool last month, and although it worked, it probably shouldn’t have done so. 

responses  my questions to ChatGPT

Its responses to my questions were only successful in ghosting me by my matches. My fierce persistence led me to try again. 

As a result, I asked ChatGPT to respond to some of my Tinder matches. The bot’s responses were reviewed by a dating expert rather than simply terrorizing strangers with bizarre messages.

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I was suffering from a lack of success finding a partner by using ChatGPT. According to Cher Gopman, dating coach and founder of NYC Wingwoman, the responses were often too long, filled with emojis, and even creepy.

“In order to be successful in dating, you have to steer clear of artificial intelligence (AI). You need to be the one to come across on these dating apps, because that’s what we’ll feel when we first meet you.”

It came off as obsessive to read the long responses

Let’s begin with a simple one: I asked ChatGPT to write a response to someone whose bio indicated they enjoyed cats. Doesn’t seem so difficult, does it?


In order to get the program to try again, I specified that it should sound more human after the first response – which I felt too uncomfortable to send to anyone. Although these iterations were made, the response still left its audience cringing:

“Hi! I noticed that both of our bios mention our love of cats. As a pet owner, I am blessed with a few fur babies who bring so much joy to my life. Is your love of cats a recent development or has it always been there? It would be my pleasure to discuss our feline friends.”

I asked Gopman about five sentences about cats, adding that one to three sentences is a good amount if you’re looking to find a common interest with a match.

“The way it was presented turned some people off,” Gopman said.

The emojis in ChatGPT are probably not going to land me any dates

My NYC Wingwoman approved only one of four prompts with emojis I sent her for review.

According to ChatGPT, if a match told me I had a pretty smile, I should respond as follows:

  • “Hello! You were right to notice me, but a smile can be deceiving, so you’ll have to get to know me better to know if I’m the real sunshine I seem.” with a winking emoticon. 
  • The above response was Gopman’s favorite out of all the writings for the app.
  • It’s kind of like, ‘Let me get to know this person a little better,'” Gopman explained. I liked the emoji for its wink – it grabbed their attention.
  • It’s best to avoid using too many emojis when communicating online, since too many can look desperate or overly enthusiastic.
  • “When you smile a lot, I think you’re too eager,” Gopman commented.
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ChatGPT generated some creepy responses

There are a lot of responses related to cats (fur babies? Feline friends? Ew!) that give off the worst vibes.

In Gopman’s opinion, the vibe sent off by the video isn’t even a friend vibe. There’s something creepy about it.”

A follow-up email from Gopman noted that when it comes to using AI for online dating, it’s important to tread lightly. Often, it responds impersonally and inauthentically – and if it’s coming up with a fake profile, then “you’re misrepresenting yourself at the outset” and may have fewer successful dates.

In order to date successfully, you need to build a connection with the person,” Gopman explained. By using a chatbot, you are letting someone else build the connection for you.”


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